Erma Bombeck


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Erma Louise Bombeck, née Fiste (February 21, 1927 – April 22, 1996) was an American humorist who achieved great popularity for her newspaper column that described suburban home life from the mid-1960s until the late 1990s. Bombeck also published 15 books, most of which became bestsellers. From 1965 to 1996, Erma Bombeck wrote over 4,000 newspaper columns chronicling the ordinary life of a ... more »

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Quotations

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  • ''Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.''
    Erma Bombeck (20th century), U.S. humorist and author. As quoted in Woman to Woman, by Julia Gilden and Mark Riedman (1994).
  • ''It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows.''
    Erma Bombeck (20th century), U.S. humorist. As quoted in Woman to Woman, by Julia Gilden and Mark Riedman (1994).
  • ''You hear a lot of dialogue on the death of the American family. Families aren't dying. They're merging into big conglomerates.''
    Erma Bombeck (b. 1927), U.S. journalist, and Andr. "Empty Fridge, Empty Nest," San Francisco Examiner (Oct. 1, 1978).
  • With girls, everything looks great on the surface. But beware of drawers that won't open. They contain a three-month supply of dirty underwear, unwashed hose, and rubber bands with blobs of hair in th...
    Erma Bombeck (20th century), U.S. humorist and author. Motherhood, the Second Oldest Profession, ch. 8 (1983).
  • Motherhood is the second oldest profession in the world. It never questions age, height, religious preference, health, political affiliation, citizenship, morality, ethnic background, marital status, ...
    Erma Bombeck (20th century), U.S. humorist and author. Motherhood, the Second Oldest Profession, introduction (1983).
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