Flying Lemming Poems

My alarm clock this morning woke me up late
Which meant that my day didn’t start great
The toaster, joining in the attack
Made all of my toast come out black
...

Buy, buy, buy
Don’t ask why

The glittering prizes on the TV
...

Thought I’d try something new
As I find that just by do-
-ing this different keeps me a-
-head of my brain every day
...

I know the date didn’t go that great
Collecting you I was an hour late
And while I was waiting in your flat
I knocked over your plant and sat on the cat
...

Dashing to the shower
Dashing to get dressed
Dashing to the car to get to town before the rest
...

Thought I’d try something new
As I said I find that do-
-ing this is a way to be a-
-head of my brain every day
...

I got to ‘A’ and was assaulted and abused
And attacked and ambushed and anger was used
And acute agony left me anxious and bemused
...

You’re not quite the height I like but I can bend a bit
You’re wider than the girls I like, I guess you could get fit
You hair is kind of mousey, not the shiny blond I seek
Your voice isn’t velvety and your laugh has that odd squeak
...

When the full moon wanders out
The freaks of nature jump about
They talk of passages of the sun
Which bring the power to everyone
...

I stand outside all night cos you wont put me away
My silver body work is a grim kind of grey
You drive me miles and miles every single day
It’s not much fun being your car
...