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Mike Acker Mike Acker Male, 60, Canada (4/17/2014 12:44:00 PM)

Will try to abide again.....

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  • Mike Acker (4/17/2014 5:05:00 PM) Post reply | Read 1 reply

    The Keepers

    When baby strollers were coffins,
    when gray matter stuck
    to the trees like wet cotton balls.

    They continued with what they do.
    Those who ate ate.
    Those who slept slept.
    Those who watched watched.

    When their children were skinned
    and their parents lost their heads,
    then their minds. They,

    they couldn't stop what they did.
    Those who laughed laughed.
    Those who looked looked.
    Those who thought forgot.

    Am I my brother's keeper?

    Mike Acker

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    • Frank Ovid (4/17/2014 10:42:00 PM) Post reply | Read 3 replies

      'The baby strollers were coffins'?Jesus Acker you just ruined a perfectly good poem. Go back to the first one. That's way too obvious, and the first version had a cute as hell rhyme going on. Are you ... more

  • Frank Ovid (4/17/2014 1:08:00 PM) Post reply

    Wow! Excellent. Shocking, enigmatic, nice little rhymes. What's not to like?Your best by far.

  • Mike Acker (4/17/2014 12:44:00 PM) Post reply | Read 2 replies

    My Brother's Keeper

    When the children were torn apart,
    And the body parts were thrown out.
    When light-colored human matter
    hung on walls like wet cotton balls.

    They continued with what they do.
    Those who ate ate.
    Those who slept slept.
    Those who watched watched.

    When their children were skinned, and their
    parents lost their heads, then their minds.
    When rape and rapine became so
    commonplace that no one dared come....
    .......to give solace

    They, they couldn't stop what they did.
    Those who laughed laughed.
    Those who looked looked.
    Those who thought forgot.

    Am I my brother's keeper?

    Replies for this message:
    • Mike Acker (4/17/2014 4:13:00 PM) Post reply

      Thank you, JC and you are right. Here is a revision.... The Keepers When baby strollers were instant coffins, and body parts were stepped upon. When human gray matter hung on walls like ... more

    • Jefferson Carter (4/17/2014 3:40:00 PM) Post reply

      This is one of Mike's best. My one complaint is that first stanza seems over-written, trying to disturb but somehow mundane, the language not expressive enough to shock. I like the gnomic qualities o ... more

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