Nicola Jane Dady Poems

I will be the first to confess that gold digging is what I do best.
You see I dig deep into the shadiest of minds
Looking for riches all the time, sifting through dirt and dark places only to find expressionless faces and brainwashed minds with empty spaces.
Being a slave for my own kind. Searching and searching unsure if i'll find.
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How can love just disappear?
I was 99% certain it was here.
Along with the mixed up emotions of happiness and fear.
I could have sworn it touched my heart, I felt it here. Makes me really wonder if it was truely there? ? If it was, then how could love just disappear?
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I have my wings
So I can fly
I'm flying so high
you cant reach me
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A gentle breeze
A sandy shore
The more I opened up
The more I saw
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Sitting here on this decrepit chair
The sight of bald heads and thinning hair
The scent of worry, air full of fear
I wonder
What am I doing here?
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I say I love myself but I know this isn't true. Because if I did. Why would I hurt myself the way I do?
Why is it ok for me to love without it in return? Why do I make the same mistakes, will I never learn?
Why do I do things that I know will only end in tears? Why can't I show emotion or let go of burden and fears?
Why do I apologise for what I believe to be right? Why do I promise people things when the best they can give me is 'might'?
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With each and every second
each circumstance will change
from situations certain
to tragic re-arrange
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There once was a Robin red breast,
Who would sit upon my fence.
I would stare at him for hours,
Wondering how long he would rest?
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If you take my heart
Please handle it with care
For its delicate and fragile
that's why I never share
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I wonder.. Could I rest my head?
I know not this stranger but I feel a warmth from his red fleece.
How would he react if I just sink into the top of his arm? Would he shrug me off in disgust as my skin bears not the same colour as him? My head feels heavy, I really want to try. I really want to rub my tears on his clothes, I yearn for his comfort when I cry. But instead I just sit beside, and wonder of this weird fantasy.
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