628. Save Me By Slaying Me! 010612 Poem by Raman Savithiri

Why this monstrous life?
Why here so much strife?
A tree deep rooted in soil
Cannot run off its life of turmoil
A deer which goes for water
Might be hunt by awful alligator
In fathomless sea dark and blue
There is no place void of blood hue
Sky be it infinite gives no shelter
To any bird sought by life battle
What if you be a celestial body
Black holes wait to eat you one day

Mahatmas say blissful is the creation
May be so, like the other side of coin
But for me, being a jeevaatma still
Existence of universe is terrible!
In this place of countless changes
So vividly birth and death dance
Before I could catch the glimpses,
I am caught in life's clutches!
Before I could sense the chains
That bind me are my own pains
Taken by my own senses five!
In the name of love, Ah! The betrayal
Foolishly how I was vulnerable!
Before the wound is healed,
Married! to be in this atrocious society
Layer by layer my ego skin is peeled!
Oh God! See! You who are in my core!
Justice won't You restore?
Where is the outlet for my anger?

Enough I saw injustice through
My eyes screened by feelings
Of anger hatred and ruthlessness.
How I badly wanted to slap and thrust
Some animals in the form of humans
Terribly ungrateful, shockingly dishonest;
Worse than thieves and murderer s
For at least these anti socials
Are straight to be punished!
But what to do with ugly hyenas
Hid under the cow's skin?

I just howl and bark unto You
Because I am a woman
Less powered than men
And have to put on masks many
Good wife, mother etc., to face society
I come to You the Omnipotent
Shedding tears, uttering Your names
Though You never showed Your face
I bang Your entrance by beating
My own chest which hosts
All unwanted feelings
Of anger, hatred and resents
To shake them off, to make a place
For Your feet to stand in my heart!

Devi! Now my complaints turn inward!
I am more afraid of the animals getting
Stronger and stronger inside!
Won't You protect me from my own
Anger, hatred and resents
Which are fed lavishly by my own ego?
I am so confused to make any complaint now!
For because I am unable to sense
Where exactly my enemies reside
Whether inside or outside
My logic and brain work not
My heart is clouded by emotions
I am not wise to find out the cause and effects
I know not tomorrow what will fall upon me
I am too ignorant to catch You continuously
Save me by slaying me Maa!
Why this meaningless life? 010612