Rudi de Beer

Rookie (14/04/91)

A Happy Ending - Poem by Rudi de Beer

raised by wrong
strengthened by lies
toughened by stares
from hateful eyes
broken thoughts
and hurt filled cries

confused and cussed at
by those
lost in a sea of sin

now he is whole
sin forgiven
Rebuilt, Revamped and Overhauled
a shining smile
a loving heart
through greatful eyes
and positive thoughts
tears of joy
he has been saved
thanks to his girl
he met one day

ten months now
an still going strong
he has gotten so far
without doing wrong

plans of marriage
a life of gold

now he is happy
and wants to grow old

(it is now a year and six months, we are still happy together and getting
closer to marriage)


Comments about A Happy Ending by Rudi de Beer

  • Rookie Kerry O'Connor (7/31/2009 12:28:00 PM)

    Your opening stanza is very powerful. Sustain your style throughout as you change the mood. (Report) Reply

    0 person liked.
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  • Rookie - 3 Points Sulaiman Mohd Yusof (7/30/2009 1:37:00 PM)

    Alright, you still need to work out on your sentence structure, choice of right words and theme.The message of a happy ending is not strong enough.As a whole, you do have a talent.Keep it up Rudi. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Rudi De Beer (7/30/2009 1:26:00 PM)

    please comment on this poem. i am a novice and would love some guidelines (Report) Reply

Read all 3 comments »



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Poem Submitted: Thursday, July 30, 2009

Poem Edited: Thursday, March 4, 2010


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