Alyssa Poem by Keith Gaboury

Alyssa

Rating: 5.0


searches the outline of her shadow
on a sizzling jungle gym blacktop
where a highway friend
zipped in and out of focus
like a busboy in a restaurant dropping a
shattering stack of jagged puzzle shards
hoping that someone will find the grace
to help him pick up the pieces.

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
John Kay 29 September 2005

Keith...your language is natural and 'unpoetic' which is good. Don't get tainted by all the 'poetry' on this website. I like this piece a lot. You'll be a fine poet if you keep working at it. I recommend that you read some Philip Levine on this site and try extending your narratives, as he does.

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