An Obituarian Poem by Ambrose Bierce

Death-poet Pickering sat at his desk,
Wrapped in appropriate gloom;
His posture was pensive and picturesque,
Like a raven charming a tomb.

Enter a party a-drinking the cup
Of sorrow-and likewise of woe:
'Some harrowing poetry, Mister, whack up,
All wrote in the key of O.

'For the angels has called my old woman hence
From the strife (where she fit mighty free).
It's a nickel a line? Cond-n the expense!
For wealth is now little to me.'

The Bard of Mortality looked him through
In the piercingest sort of a way:
'It is much to me though it's little to you
I've _taken_ a wife to-day.'

So he twisted the tail of his mental cow
And made her give down her flow.
The grief of that bard was long-winded, somehow-
There was reams and reamses of woe.

The widower man which had buried his wife
Grew lily-like round each gill,
For she turned in her grave and came back to life
Then he cruel ignored the bill!

Then Sorrow she opened her gates a-wide,
As likewise did also Woe,
And the death-poet's song, as is heard inside,
Is sang in the key of O.