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I am red as blood-leaf. My roots go down deep Into the singing earth: Into the rain dead shadows Of the underworld, Where rocks are scorched Charcoal grey And the cold sinks bones Into jellied yesterdays.
The child I carry on my back, Petrified in permafrost, Will not thaw in these hot hands.
I cast a web of lines Into the river. Silver hooks pierce The woman-flesh Of passive fish: Their big eyes Full of weary sorrow, Just like my mother’s.
My father breathes out A sour haze: Spinning my skin In a taut tizz Of anxiety. Heavy as a cadaver, He leans his weight on me. Trembling with urgency, He whispers: Kill it... Kill it dead”.
The blood-leaf Curdles inside me: Its shallow shadow Slipping through A sift of skin. The tides ululate To the dance Of the moon; And I am assaulted By the shivering child I carry on my back.
The knife is keen. It pares the flesh To a feather of bones And lets loose A red cascade Of forgotten viscera.
There’s a poetry In unadulterated violence: Cut with raw speed, It bleeds you Of all indifference.
But it is not enough, My father says; And I must kill it dead, Kill it dead again.
The blood-leaf twists me: An opiate spume Dribbles from my wounds. I am lost now To dreams of healing, But doomed to carry The child on my back Another mile.
Rimbaud Dee
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