Blunting Emotional Pain Poem by James McLain

I started cutting because
of what my
psychiatrist said to the Judge
he said it may look
foreign,
a little bit frightening
to parents that have abused
their small kids
for people that don't
understand
unhealthy emotional demands
teenage mothers, unknown fathers
in prison or jail
secret cults that have nothing to do
with the devil
just because I know your
son and or daughter
better than you do and why they no
longer can cry
twenty years ago before she was born
he understood why
we are friends that now share secret smiles
most are very smart
we try to hurry growing up
being Goth
dressed in black shades of grey
numb the pain
feeding us a cocktail of drugs
those same Judges
and Doctors bought stock in.

Pictures then of unhappy kids
taken by they of
our parents
getting caught in the rain
becoming pregnant
again, going to Church
making gross claims about their religion
paying homage
to the greatest cutter of them all
calling on him
their Catholic father
and my mother his sister in Christ
I grow tired of
being their patient, being to sensitive
those overachievers
a regular child in irregular times
with symptoms of
borderline personality disorder,
anxiety disorder, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia
and all of their cuts
I struggle to hide now from them.