Can I Still Be My Host! ? Poem by Humerous Outlaw

This whole time I was lost to find
Squabbling with myself tossing it blind
The reason to get back to me
The time I always left behind

I was young soft to the heart
Getting closer much not to fall apart
I found one to spend my life
All of it was a thought but never to strife

Then after years you left me behind
I was broken only to realise I was blind
Wasted I thought the time I gave
The less I did the more I expected

Broken inside called for an ally
Only to find another one to cry
Never saw u but still a bond
Existed between us within the pond

Only text pulled me closer
Dreamt about future to be a loser
Tried a lot to make you jolly
But one mistake has shattered again our folly

Life taught another chapter
The more u expect
The more you capture
The dreams in your heart is only yours
Your cuts and wounds can only cure
The pain is just to believe
Dont be naive trust urself and pay heed

It took a long time to realise
Thoughts without base can't be wise
Agony inside can't cover your lies
Felony of past can again reprise

How naive I was to understand
Noone Can cease it apart and spanned
Coz the one whom we love the most
Can only hurt us a lot and the memories chase us like a ghost

Can I still be my host! ? ? ?