Jake Deeds

Rookie - 74 Points (5/11/1965 / Arkansas)

Chosen - Poem by Jake Deeds

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The moon hung at half mast
And frowned upon the frozen ground
The passage to the perilous past
Where silence sealed the sound…
And the brass came tumbling down
Across the race and rigid face lay
Scar on top of scar…
A stoic stare neither here nor there
And a soiled Silver Star....


Comments about Chosen by Jake Deeds

  • Gold Star - 9,154 Points Daniel Brick (4/16/2015 10:31:00 AM)

    Your language is extremely vivid, it's clearly poetic speech which is something we look for because who wants more p-r-o-s-e? But I.m unclear about what or who is CHOSEN. And I have no idea what the Silver Star refers to
    but it appears prominently at the end. Some notes clarifying such specific images will help., (Report) Reply

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  • Rookie - 0 Points Anthony Burge (4/7/2013 2:04:00 AM)

    Seems we are both inspired by natures bounty, beautiful words Jake. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Howard Johnson (2/1/2012 9:47:00 AM)

    This is a fabulous piece, keep writing poet! (Report) Reply

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Poem Submitted: Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Poem Edited: Thursday, November 17, 2011


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