Counting Sheep Poem by Bill Simmons

Sheep one, he jumps right over
Sheep two, he slips on my shoe
Sheep three, seems to be as drunk as can be
Sheep four, he crashes through my bedroom door

Sheep five, stops long enough to say hi
Sheep six is helping three, three is getting sick
Sheep seven is praying, hoping to get to heaven
Sheep eight drives my car right through my front gate

Sheep nine says, lets all have a good time
Sheep ten says, Now, don't pay us no mind
I said boys, I need to get sleep
You need to do it right, I need to count sheep

Sheep eleven says, go count them yourself
Now raiding my refrigerator it was sheep twelve
Sheep thirteen, the black one looked mean
He was butting that head like I've never seen

He was tearing up my furniture all through the house
Even scared half to death, one small house mouse
So you want to know why I am so late
You ought to see what them sheep did to my front gate

I told them boys, they need to do it right
But they said it was a party, and it was last night
I'm sorry sir for me being late
What? You don't believe a word that I say

Well that's all right, I’ll go get some sleep
Coming in for me today will be that thirteenth sheep
Well right away he starts butting them well
Perhaps next time they'll believe the story I tell.

2006 Bill Simmons