Crazyness Is A State Of Mind-An Argument Poem by Charlotte Ballard

I heard an argument
In the day-room, yesterday.
I was to be the referee
To make it civilized and free.

Ted told me that Sam and him
Were trying to decide the
Best way to proceed.

About what, I asked.
Ted said-the best known way to kill
And, of course, the neatest way to clean
The scene of traces of blood and brain.

Oh, I said. O.K. by me.

Ted said-
Neatness is important-
No fuss, no muss, when
Poison is used. Only a funny grin
And it's done-you see.

Sammie pouted and pointed out
That poison ruins the texture of the meat
And makes it quite unfit to eat.

But blood stains the shirt and shoes
And won't come off the rug. And what
Do you do about the oatmeal brains,
Scattered around for luck?
Ted did reply to this.

What do you think, they asked me that day.

I pondered a bit and did considered
Most carefully everything that had been seen.
Finally, I gave my pronouncement-
You're both right, I answered with pride.
It doesn't matter how you kill
The women that prowl after your mind,
Only that you get as many,
As your pantry can provide.