Justine Matako

(03/18/1996)

danger walking in the shadows


Don't know what to think

Submitted: Wednesday, February 20, 2013
Edited: Saturday, February 23, 2013

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Poet's Notes about The Poem

You put me in danger
Its like theres no one there
Im tired of feeling threatened
With the fear of being beat
Most people don't see it
Like its not really there
The pain i have i hide so no one knows
But i can't stand in fear no longer
Stay away from me
I don't know weather or not you'll hit me
If you do then i don't know
Im tired of hiding in the dark
I fake my smile
I never used to
Thank you for breaking my happiness
But your probably enjoying it
Im scared to even be in school with the fear of your presence
I scream in the dark
i scream in my head
But no one hears me cuz their silent to everyone elses ears
the most quietest person is always to fear
For the fear something is wrong but never tells
I just keep thinking
is my life gonna be over soon
Is this the last day ill be able to breath
i tell everyone im fine
even though they see the pain in my eyes
i fake being happy
but the one thing i don't fake is being in pain and being scared
Everyone will soon find out how deep my pain is...
I go to sleep screaming inside
Is this what i deserve?
Is this what i get?
I don't know but i know this isn't a bet
You do it for pleasure
you love seeing me squirm
but my last words will be sorry
sorry for everything
But wait...why should you even have the night to tourment me?
Did i do something wrong?
The fear of you coming up behind me
Your hands around my wrist
Leaving bruises on my body
Not knowing what to do next
i hope itll never happen
But hope is just a word
But i can't help but think that somethings always gonna happen
So I'm just gonna wait
If you do hit me..No ones stopping you
That'll be the last time you'll ever be doing it
I hope you get your ass beat behind bars cuz thats were you'll be
the next time you decide to do something don't ever lay your hands on me
You can cause me pain and beat me
But i still have the power to lock your ass up
Having these dreams replaying in my head of you holding me down and you just beating me
Waking up in the middle of the night screaming thinking its just a dream
going to school the next day hiding bruises having a busted lip and black eye
showing everyone what you did
Ill hide everything with the pain in my eyes

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