maria sudibyo

(280883 / parist van java)

Dear, Forgiveness

It's hurt the fight that happened
But it's more painful the words we don't say to another
Dear, forgiveness
Is it still a long time to meet you once more?
Can we not come back together?
Or could I see you before everything is over?
Dear, forgiveness
Is it hard to understand and give a chance?
Could I pull you out from the dark world of hate?
Or are you still blind with your own twisted mind?

Don't pity yourself 
Don't plea with your wailing voices
Dear, forgiveness
Does my heart already turn into stone?
I will not look, I will not be moved
Since I know the tear is just a show from you
Dear, forgiveness
I will not comfort,  I will turn my back
I don't give a damn anymore
Because I find this ugly gaping wound is stretched further

I will give you all flower,  shower you with undivided attention
I'll follow what you want, pay how much the price
Dear, forgiveness
Should I right away tell you that I'm sorry?
Should I raise the mood with something unrelated?
Or will it be better if I stay away and wait the storm gone?
Dear, forgiveness
Is there something unknown be done wrong?
Should I lose myself to bitterness?
Or must I endure this childish game of pride?

The doubt, the anger, then remark
The shout, the cry then make up
Dear, forgiveness
Can you see that it is the same old story?
How long the peace will last till another war is started?
Have you not been tired of all of these things?
Dear, forgiveness
Does it still have any use?
Is there something that will be changed?
Or will we round about roundabout?

It is choked in my throat
It curses my foolish and careless mistake
Dear, forgiveness
Do I still have a right to call you my friend?
Have you already stopped believe in me?
I almost could not stand the guilt that consumed me
Dear, forgiveness 
Could you take this heavy weight?
Could we mend this broken ship?
How I yearn to hear the redemption if only you open your eyes

It is too late to take back the lie
Why now should you kneel and beg?
Dear, forgiveness
What are you trying to gain with this apology?
Is there anything left other than the blame?
What about this grief and betrayal I feel?
Dear, forgiveness
Do you really have any sense of regret?
Can you admit the fault and mean it well?
Or do you just forget it tomorrow?

Submitted: Tuesday, April 09, 2013
Edited: Wednesday, October 09, 2013

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