Distorted Desires Poem by ash enslow

Ive always been real good at making bad decisons
im even gettin deeper at diggin the hole i live in

pushing away the poeple that want me to stay close
being angry all the time cuz its myself i hate the most

trying to figure out the reason i behave in ways
that only alienate the ones i want to stay

feeling like im nuts becoming a hopeless metal case
waiting to be taken to that special people place

i know i speak about myself in a pittiful negative tone
cuz deep down rooted in my soul is my spirit sad and alone

so unsure of who i am and where i firmly stand
i often trip and stumble making sense of this foreing land

what i want is to be free from whats been hindering me
always getting lost on my way back to reality

so i stay stuck looking for a love that dont exist
temptation and distorted desires keeps me in its grip.

how to break free and just wake up and feel normal again
god must hate me and curse me down for loosing faith in him.