Fragmented Soul Poem by Himadari Jayasinghe

Far far away in an unnamed land
There's a port waiting for me to embark
open hands, indefinable smiles
seagulls calling my name(with wrong pronunciation)
Throughout the night

Shall I?
I dare not ask
your lips are sealed
your thoughts opaque
you let your hand loose this time
I will

For it's I who choose the wood to build my ship
For it's I who raised the sails
For it's I who selected the best wind and decided to journey alone

Sea wet sand
Burning hot under my feet
Green seaweeds
Turning brown..
Dying
Gasps of tiny fish
Murmuring the urge to return..
yet too proud
to plead the rushing waves
Lips aching in thirst
glasses of wine
Oozing blood red
Waiting
Shall I
I dare not ask
For it's not you who wanted me to sail
For it's not you who showed the guiding star
So what if i
name the land
with the name I wanted
to call you
all the time
But never
wanted you to hear
that
till I leave