God, Save Me From My Bengali Wife! / The Blunder Of My Life Poem by Bijay Kant Dubey

God, save me, save from my Bengali wife,
So self-centred, so selfish,
So narrow and parochial,
So anti-Hindi and linguistical,
A plotter and a planner
With a hidden agenda and scheme of hers.

In gesture, manner and food habit,
She but all different
As hers is a life of
Eggs, fish and meat food habit
Which she needs daily
And she cannot without these,
So hooked and crooked
And so screwed,
She can mislead anytime.

Her parents her own, teacher gods,
Knowledge-givers, light-givers
And she getting them otherwise,
The tips to get out my parents,
To be sent to oldman homes,
My brothers and sisters not her own
And she treats them as paying guests,
As dogs to be given food.

A small family girl, a small world fellow
She can never be of a large heart,
To taunt and to tone down
Her racial nature
To put the ironical statements,
To criticize and complain,
To pin and perforate your nature,
Always keeping a poor health,
Always suffering from the stomach problem
And to cook food two times
Is to see the mountain fallen before,
Live on fast and junk foods,
Appoint a cook for her,
A weakling baby of seven months.

Speaks she sweetly no doubt mixing sugar and molasses
But from her inward within
Very, very critical and hooked,
A self-centred and selfish Bengali girl is she,
Looking histrionic,
Doing the role in an opera
But serpentine,
I mean Nagakanya,
The daughter of Nagaraja and Nagin,
Spitting venom in my house,
Ready for the crack, fissure and friction,
Ready as for to separate and partition,
The dreamer of a nuclear family system
And the breaker of the joint family system.

To hurt your feelings and wound you her job,
To sprinkle salt on your wounds,
Looks she innocent but is not,
Just appears to be,
She has grown up
But poses as Khoki, Toothless One
Even now,
Trying to take out the things from your stomach
Speaking eye to eye with you
Just like a detective
But can blackmail you.

God, save, save me from my Bengali wife this time,
Never shall I make the blunder again
Of selecting a Bengali wife
So linguistically chauvinistic, so anti-Hindi,
So self-centred and critical,
O Radha-Govind, Krishna with your consort,
Please give the judgement!