Good & Worth Poem by lily Ahmad

I gasped a lot, so quickly.
Turned around, so fast.
Tryin to find the door
Tryin to find the way
But, how can I do?
While I'm blind,
but I still didn't stop
I just kept tryin,
but I hadn't felt myself.
I didn't recognize what I was doing.
Then, I had to stop..
I had to stop & ask myself:
Am I ready to it?
Does it take all of that?
Is it worth?
Am I ready to lose myself for it?
Or I am already done...
Will I be able to get over it?
Will anyone care?
Will anyone even notice that! !
If I was dead.
I lost hope....
I lost hope of everything..
I felt as my soul had run away from me.
Am I over reacting?
Or: they who don't feel?
Is it really worthless?
Or: I'm who so sensetive?
Oh my God,
Is it a dream or real?
Am I right or am I wrong?
Am I weak or am I strong?
Am I dead or am I alive...
All of these thoughts ran into my head,
I was trapped,
Like a butterfly trapped in a spider's net.
Can not fly, can not move.
Physically alive but almost dead.
I stood quite,
thought of good things
that doesn't even exist.
Again: Tryin to find an answer..
I felt dizzy, brethless, hopeless..
unable to think, unable to contrast,
unable to move..
I wasn't sure of anything
I wasn't even sure
if I was alive or dead.
But I was quite sure of just one thing,
That,
Whatever it was....
I've not to care
I've to complete my way
and get over it
Actally I've to keep on
With no looking at the past
Without even glancing
I will just have to believe in something
Good & Worth