Andrew Leone

(United States)

Goodbye Jolene


as I got closer to you I noticed your smile was fake because I taught myself the same smile. I could see the pain behind it. and when you started telling me how Dan treated you and seeing how it affected you, I thought I could save you. Trish instilled in me that if you love someone or care about someone then you would fight for that person and if you fought for that person, there would be nothing to stop not even god himself. it wasn't until now that I realized that I had no right to do so. you weren't mine to fight for. I saw it as the knight trying to save his beloved from the big bad king or you were the damsel in distress and I was trying to rescue you from the evil king but I was stupid and didn't realize what I was doing until it was too late. I'm sorry I did this to you. you already lost so much that I just made everything worse. there is nothing I can do to fix this, not a damn thing and if there, I'd pray to god to give me a sign. you didn't need this, you didn't need me. you didn't want to fall for me but I didn't let up. I wanted to make you happy and give you a life I felt you deserved but it wasn't my right to, wasn't my job too. what I did was wrong and I would do anything to express how sincere I am. I honestly hope you and Dan fix things and become the happy couple you were once. I know deep down inside you're broken but try to look to find your bright light, your reason to keep fighting. don’t give up, not like me. I'm giving up. I'm tired of trying to make myself happy, I've lost my reason to keep fighting on. just please don't lose yours. so whatever happens to me and if something ever should, don't think twice on it. I don't know if anything we experienced together was real for you; the emotions, the kissing, the look in your eyes, but it was real for me. I meant everything I said and I would give it all away for 5 minutes with you. all I want and nothing, then to hear you knocking at my door. I would give anything just to see that look in your eyes, you gave me that Friday night. I guess our goodbye wasn't all that beautiful and I won't forgot how your eyes were so bright and the first time met, how much we was in love that night.

Goodbye…

Submitted: Sunday, June 09, 2013
Edited: Saturday, June 22, 2013

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