How I Spent My Summer Of Sin Poem by Ramona Thompson

You must never know
You must never even come close
To the truth
I must do everything that is within my power
To steer you clear
Clear of them and of him
The friends and new lover I made
While you were away from me
Hurt, bitter and thinking of divorce as your only option

Our marriage was hanging by a thread
A rapidly fraying thread of hope
If you knew how much more I contributed to that
If you knew how much further I fell
The fragile trust we have rebuilt would break and shatter
Never again to be put back right
Never again to be the way it used to be
Forever just you and me

There's a baby on the way now
One that I must somehow keep you from ever knowing is not yours
I betrayed you, yes
But it was only once
He was only a stranger
Someone neither you nor I knew
Someone neither of us will ever have contact with again
That much I will sure of

Secrets and lies
I have so many
I've told so many
I don't even think I know anymore
What is real
What is true
Just so mixed-up and confused
My heart in a mess over one dumb, not so simple mistake

A mistake you must never learn the truth behind
The truth of how I spent my summer of sin

2009 Ramona Thompson