Humpty, The King And Jack! Poem by Robert Edgar Burns

If Humpty Dumpty had eaten 
A golden brown toasted cheese,
Cheese would have glued his egg shell
Through his sweaty pores you see.
Then he need not have bothered
That Old King Cole,
Who was out with his men
Riding horses for show!
If you find a ring around a rosie
Just bring it here to me to pawn.
I’ll give you all the top dollar,
Until my money is all gone!
Please don’t skip over to my Lou,
The icy ground will make you fall too!
Like Jack and Jill who tumbled down
But they didn’t break their necks or frown!
Curds and whey what can I say?
Some will eat it, others tuffet away!
Frair-a-jocka, frair-a-jocka, when you get to college
You’ll live in a dorm-a-voo!
But don’t sawn a lay Matina,
Or she will call you a ding dang dong too!

Now let’s move on ahead from nursery rhymes
To the sounds from a nursery school.
Or maybe some smells that come from there
With the crying all babies do!
Put a clothes pin clip on the end of your nose
And hope that it isn’t a boy!
For if he faces you while he’s being changed,
He can squirt up a present, no joy!
They will giggle and wiggle and then jiggle their nose.
While stuffing into mouths their tiny toes.
Man if I was only that limber,  
I would do stunts in a picture show!
The first stanza had exactly twenty two lines,
But don’t waste your time to count!
There are fourteen lines here, now fifteen dear,
Only six more lines to go!
I
Can
Do
That Standing
On 
My Head!