I Am Weak Poem by Makayla Straight

Will I ever be okay?
Today I looked in the mirror
All I saw was the mask
That everybody else sees
I cant even be myself when its just me
I paint this smile
I laugh off my tears
Nobody sees this
Sees the pain that I am in
I hide it
Its all I ever known
It was never okay to shed tears
That was my weakness.
So now that my tears pour
I feel so ashamed and weak
Why am I crying?
I dont even know
So much is going through my head
Nobody understands this pain
The bruises on the inside hurt
Yet I have to walk to the pain off
Act like nothing has happened
For all you know nothing has happened
Nobody has bothered to care
So why start caring now
Life has me going crazy
Its up and down
Mostly down these last couple of months
It feels as if I can never do right
I screw up all the damn time
It does not help
When I look in the mirror
I hear the voice of discourage
Calling me names
Telling me I can never do it
I am a failure to life.
Whats even worse
I start to believe it.
I do not know how to stop it
But when I try to block it out
It grows louder
Making my tears pour even more
Yet I still convinced crying is bad.
It shows too much weakness
But maybe
Just maybe thats me
Maybe I am weak
I just need to accept the facts.