I Love You Not Him Poem by James McLain

Long words that mean nothing
to the unread, stories are mean.

Setting the phone down as it rings
I twist the cord into knott's, just the thought
makes me think not again.

How can I think of her but not him
if I'm not gay,
what I saw growing up believing in one.

I can't have full release with them both
if I'm thinking of the other one
I can't love one, just one missing them both
how ever one thinks but I do.

Can I think about you if you're not the one
the way that I'm not supposed to but do
about her if it is not you are not him if I'm her?

Listen to me not your mother I saw her do
what she said that she saw
what your father did not do to me do
just yesterday that reminds you of him
but not her
and the end of the story was never not told
is the way
that you act to the one not the other
if its going to be you I love
and not him.