"I, The Wretch, And My Amazing Grace" (9/21 - 9/27/2015) Poem by Paulina LozadaCortez

Such a thing as "forgetting" was impossible
For a Wretch such as I.
But she smiled at me anyway -
She always did.
My Amazing Grace

Nausea hit me like a tidal wave,
For I knew what would come next -
-What always came next.

"Better? "
She asked, hope in her eyes.

Her eyes...
Hmm.
Always alight with the wide-eyed wonder of a child,
Who sees the world in the brightest of colors,
Welcoming every being with open arms.
She was like home.
If only she knew...

I Weave my lies like the spun spider's web
And manage to Spin a lie so tight
That not even I could Escape.

She Fell for it every time,
Eating my taught knots,
My enchanting false-truths,
My beautiful silken threads…

But this time was different.

Only now, as she kissed my forehead,
And consoled me,
Humming the sweetest of lullabies
My heart finally tore itself in half.

Not even the web I'd spun,
Taught like a bow-string,
And as strong as steel,
Could mend the barren shreds of my heart.