I Waited Poem by Emmanuel Arunee Mwanza

I want you to hear this
I want you to read this
I want you to feel this
I wanted you to know that I was to wait
For you I was ready to shed tears…I was to wait…
But I did not know what I was doing
I really underestimated everything about us
The time …that we could be together…
I waited
The hatred that was there between us,
That lay there inside us behind our innocent beautiful hearts…
I waited
The sadness that was slowly building within that our faces hid
The lies that you and I shared…
Made it seemed normal…to lie, on your part,
but I
Calculated everything about you and I found out…
The math were so simple
I added 1 to 1 I got a one
It was wrong math…for those who know math
And the theory behind it
But you and I were to be one
I calculated and it was very correct in our own way
…and I was ready to wait…

For you…


I want you to hear this
I want you to read this
I want you to feel this
I wanted you to know that I was to wait
For you…


I cried …you were not dead...neither were you gone but..i was really into you..
The very love I had for you
Had turned into hatred for me
I tried, you were not ready to listen
You closed your ears…to my cry
You showed me your back to my try
You closed your eyes to my face


I cried
I tried
I hoped we could share a life together...
Us
That was all I could foresee ahead of us
Allow me to borrow some religious terms
And sorry but I am trying to be blasphemous
but
I was a church
I had followers
I was the follower, and I made you one too
In my prophecies that were before me
It was all to cease somehow...but I was ready to wait
for you...
Because it was 'US' that I saw in my own world
So give me your ears,
Come with your eyes
Hold on to what I say
For I really believed in us
I waited


Time passed by
month 1
Nothing from you
I could not take it
month 2...still nothing
And the months turned into years
And we finally talked
Because I waited
If you are reading this...you not her
You would think it was a good comeback
a reunion that was to last
NO! ! !
I think it was just this service station in life
where we have to refuel the hatred
That lay between our beautiful souls
What followed after the contact
I have said already...hate
But I waited


Should we say you did not feel for me?
My love
Was it that you were too grown up a woman?
Was I this toddler in your eyes?
I still wonder why I had to wait
Yet I did
Honestly, I still do wait
Maybe,
That maybe, maybe we will love each other again
Like the years back
I still wait, that maybe the stories that we started years ago
Would be re written
It started well...it had some lows...
There were anger, hate in between
Not wanting to listen in between
Wanting to understand and be heard in between
And how good would it be that the new story never ends with my wait
But ends with our comeback
But ends with our love


If you are not coming back love
however,
just know
I waited for you and
I had erased the parts you hurt me