If Poem by Linda Ori

If

Rating: 3.3


If I could walk on water
If I could calm your sea
Perhaps you'd take a second chance
And trust your heart to me

If I could make your sun shine
If I could rise your moon
Perhaps you'd really look at me
And see you left too soon

If I could bring you wisdom
If I could mold your dreams
Perhaps you'd know just who I am
All is not as it seems

But then I'd have to wonder
Whose purpose was defined
Would you have made these choices
Had I not controlled your mind?

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Frank James Ryan Jr...fjr 20 February 2007

Midnight>>>And how right you are..A person has to realise within themselves that what they do is the right thing, & for the right reasons...Very well expressed, young lass! ~ F.j.R.~ -O2-20-07-

0 0 Reply
David Harris 20 February 2007

Linda, this is so easy to read and written so lovely. Beautiful. I loved it. Don't change the title it fits this piece like a glove. I've given it full marks. Your opening two line captured me straight away on this. David

0 0 Reply
Charles M Moore 20 February 2007

Excellent finish to an excellent poem.

0 0 Reply
Alison Cassidy 21 February 2007

To accept the perfection of the way things are; to feel contented with yourself as you are, warts and all - that is the message of this profound piece, written simply and sweetly. Your IF is beautiful, Linda. love, Allie xxxx

0 0 Reply
Catastrophe King 23 February 2007

I just loved your poem so very much. I specially love this 'IF' subject... just posted some poems today with this big IF. I just loved the begining stanza of this poem.... Perhaps you'd take a second chance..... loved this line!

0 0 Reply
Dee Daffodil 05 March 2007

Brilliant piece! Hugs, Dee

0 0 Reply
Not a member No 4 03 March 2007

Bridging the differences, closing the gaps between lovers, old or new, but especially old is a problematic business. Maybe better to work with acceptance of them as the final stanza implies in this terrific piece of quality poetry. Fluid, rhythmic and plaintive. Excellent Linda. jim xxx

0 0 Reply
fanniesson - 02 March 2007

great flow great poem great ending I truly enjoyed it

0 0 Reply
David Taylor 01 March 2007

Linda, this is very good, how much we want to influence but then again we want to feel it was the other persons aim, Yes, Very good and nicely written, Thank -you.

0 0 Reply
Radhika Karia 24 February 2007

A really nice poem. simple words with great feelings. love the first para.. good work!

0 0 Reply
READ THIS POEM IN OTHER LANGUAGES
Close
Error Success