It Takes The 'Taint' Out Of Tantillizing Poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar

What makes a nonstory worthy of news?
When those involved admit it.
Without benefit of apology.
At least one that does not please.
And a scandal wished,
Diminishes with bite.
Leaving a desire to rip one to shreds,
Completely pointless.
Especially if one anticipates it.
And this removes the excitement!

'Come on, David.
Let us be the ones to embarrass you.
What fun is in it if you seem to enjoy,
All of this unnessarry nonsense...
With a provocativeness that really isn't news.
About who you had sex with and their consentment?
It takes the 'taint' out of tantillizing!
Why did 'you' announce your degradations...
To leave us appearing as fools?
Comeon, David.
We had hopes to embarrass you! '

~And Ladies and Gentlemen...
I must confess this:
The one reporting my trangressions,
Had not been invited.
And as democracy would have it,
A vote was taken.
I assure you my sexual activities,
Had the best of intentions to benefit all.
That one 'man' was disgruntled,
Leaves me rather pleased.
No one else found my activities,
That envious enough to heat up such 'meatless' controversy.~