Just Not There Poem by David Knox

Every time i try to talk its like you're never there
All the time try to reach you and I'm met with silence
Often I'll wonder if i committed some offense
I pray it's not because you don't care
Sometimes I feel ignored
But how could I blame you when I label myself abhorred
And believe the lie I want you to see through
Please don't believe the lie.... not you
Whether you do
Or you don't, I just wish you were there
Just wish you were here
Because I'm the one who makes the effort but your shoulder is cold
I'm the conversation starter, but I can't escape the fear
That you only talk to me because I talk to you, so I must wonder
Just what do I mean to you when you're not there
Just what do I mean to you when I don't even know if you CARE
Even when we're talking I sometimes feel you're not there, somewhere else
When I draw near you treat me like an enemy and repulse
Back away, I can't even been 'there' with you as a friend
I wonder if you could ever love me if to you I'm just not present
I feel like I'm invisible so how can I be content
To be put on the back burner
To simmer until my heart boils over and there's nothing left
To cry over my charred heart utterly bereft
Sorry to attack like some malinger
That's not my intent I just lament that... you're just not there