Like Thanksgiving Poem by Robert Edgar Burns

My wife says each day is like Thanksgiving.
It's what she gets marrying a turkey like me.
I told her she could eat more prune Danish.
Then her constipation just might break out free.

I went to Ben-Hur's wedding,
When he wed his sweetheart Ben-He.
They had a son named Ben Gay.
Which used to mean happy to me.

I have a friend who is an Italian,
And another who is a Jew.
If they can't buy things wholesale,
They will simply steal it for you.

I won't walk through Jewish neighborhoods.
When I do it really scares me.
I don't want to be killed by an accountant.
Just what would that say about me?

When Arabs invaded Israel,
The French and Italians surrendered.
The Polish offered Israel aid,
But forgot somehow to remember.

Congress will always have their paydays.
Even when you have no food on your plate.
Perhaps if we would put them on commission,
They might rise up and do something great.

The biggest problem in the world today
Is our hatred of our fellow man.
The women of Earth should wear high heels,
And kick us all right in our cans.