Lunch. Poem by Lizzy Tomlinson

I am feeling proud as punch,
As I sit here having lunch,
On a lettuce leaf, I crunch,
A whole one tho' I'll have to munch.

'Cause I am on a lettuce diet,
And you can't roast this, nor fry it,
I advise you all not to even try it,
(I still don't know what made me buy it) .

Well finished now, if that was food,
I tell you, it's done me no good.
My stomach's telling me I could,
Go to the shops. I think I should.