March 12th Poem by Andrus Cassian

Too long
I have put this off for too long
I have said to myself to say this aloud
yet I contradict myself
by putting it off to the next day
No more
so please stick with me
and endure my words for I know they get lengthy
I am done
in case you don't understand or misheard
I'm done
done with what
Done reporting the tale of the Sorceress
done reciting my love of the Sorceress
done retorting of how despicable her existence in my life is
so this day I kill her
so this day her name is dead
and she will forever be dead to me
I failed to show I was moving on
a mistake in communication
I failed to prove she was all but a memory now
but she would've never listened
but she would've never paid attention
I spent four years in wasted agony
to have her say it to my face
she's now engaged
I've spent four years in wasted love
to have her the words I sculpted in roses
thrown back in my face
and all that love shoved back down my throat
Every instance I defended her name
I feel like I should've shunned it
denounced it
shredded it into a million pieces
and made a mosaic in the snow
with a mist of yellow fluid
or just take it to her doorstep
in a drunken rage
for I have once again played my one man drinking games
well so I thought
I'm done. done
She can take me off her worry list
I have taken her off of mine
All I had to her
were tainted memories
and a grudge against every single person she ever shoved in my face
but I guess I loved the pain
for I wouldn't have held on for this long
but I guess I believed she was the center of this
the center of my reasons for writing
the part of me that made me a better writer
How naive can I be
I have doused myself in fire
in fire for all the times she doubled crossed my heart
in fire for all the lies she forced fed me
in fire for all the nights I lay awake in fueled hate
for the way she double crossed me
So it's this day I say good day
So it's this day I say so long
So it's this day I say goodbye
Goodbye, good riddance
for I hate you now more than ever
Goodbye, good riddance
for you are dead to me forever
Goodbye, good riddance
for I hope you drown in a pit of despair
the one you kicked me down deeper in
Goodbye, good riddance
for I could care less anymore
my forever endeavor has silenced
Goodbye, good riddance
Sarah the Sorceress
Goodbye, good riddance
March 12th
the day, it means nothing now
March 12th
the day I died
March 12th
I douse in fire
Goodbye, good riddance