Mary Alverna Stowell - Beverage - June 8,1926 – June 11,2007 Poem by Emma Beverage

Written By Caroline Emma Beverage (Third child, second daughter)

I thought that I was wise and worldly.
Death held no fear for me.
I've faced death down; I am not cowardly.
I've grown old and even welcomed it.

Why can't I stop these tears?
They do not come from fear.
Logically I know
death is the final goal.
Death is a matter of time,
when we are old.

Loving actions taken for granted
now significant in my mourning.
The clang of pots and pans every morning.
Slipping off to sleep to that same sound.
That is why I will not cook - even now.

There is no glory in preparing meals for ten children.
We were so poor that I grew to hate pinto beans.
Today that meal would be a treat.
Your bread and rolls the very best!
Garden fresh veggies can't be beat.

You sewed so that your little army
would have clothes for school.
I have never bothered to sew anything!
Your hands hard from housework, gardening,
feeding chickens, pigs and cows for milking.

You a country girl …
wanted to provide a place in the country for your kids.
Saved secretly, to buy some land.
Needed permission from your husband.
I forged daddy's signature because the laws of our land
did not treat you like you were an adult.

You had dreams.
Found time to draw and paint.
Passed your talents down to your children.

You told us stories about growing up on a ranch.
Your grandmother was bedridden
so you cooked for the hired hands.

The soles of your feet were tough as leather.
You ran around barefoot in all sorts of weather.
Your toes were nimble from not being imprisoned in shoes.
You could throw a rock over your house with your toes.

Annie Oakley, Little Annie Sure Shot, was your hero.
We didn't have much meat, we were too poor.
you took a twenty-two rifle and shot cottontail rabbits to feed us.
Sometimes a jackrabbit but they were stringy and tough.

I have seen you shoot a yellow jacket out of the air 60 feet away!
Just to show me that you could shoot like Little Annie.

How many times did you lovingly take care of us
as we healed from injury or illness?
We took it all for granted.
Sometimes we were critical.
We did not want to share your attention
we wanted to receive more.
With ten kids some felt ignored.

You were always petite and fit.
Slender from the energy you burned
from all of the work, you never stopped.

I was a teenager, your car broke down
so we decided to walk into town.
We were both proud of how quickly
we covered the miles.

Mid life for you,
you were still filled with energy and dreams.
You were building your own house.
Then surrendered your dreams to rescue my family and me.

How often did you sacrifice your dreams for your loved ones?
Then the years of sacrifice and toil caught up with you.

Broke you down.
Still you rose again from the ashes
and lived to fight on.
Only to be caught
and trapped by age.

An unstoppable woman put in a cage.

And now
you have escaped.

And now
you are free.