Moonbee's Sci-Fi - Bar Jokes & Riddles... Poem by MoonBee Canady

' Sci-Fi Bar Jokes & Riddles... '

(1 Tim.1: 11)


(1.)
'Star Wars Bar...'

A Jedi Knight and a Wookie, walk into a bar...
The Jedi tells the bartender to keep the drinks coming.
Around dawn, when the Jedi is too drunk to think,
the bartender, then tells them both, its time to pay
their tab. Then the Jedi, turns to his buddy, the Wookie
and asks, 'Do You Mind? '


Written & Copyrighted ©: 1/31/2014
by: MoonBee Canady


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(2)
'Dune's Sand Bar...'

On Arrakis, the desert planet known as Dune,
A Duke and a Baron, walks into a bar...
Now, which one orders the biggest bottle of Mezcal?


Written & Copyrighted ©: 1/31/2014
by: MoonBee Canady


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(3)
'The Matrix-Mixer Bar...'

Neo and Morpheus, walk into a bar...
On that night, every patron, gets their first drink free
Now, the selection is between two drink choices on
the list: They can choose either the 'Crimson Cocktail'
or the 'Blue Kamikaze'... Which did Neo pick?


Written & Copyrighted ©: 1/31/2014
by: MoonBee Canady


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(4)
'Stargate Symbol Bar...'

Col. O'Neill and Teal'c, walk into the Stargate
and wine-up in a bar (he-he) ... in a world
very much like our own. While there, they
socialize with the locals, sample strange brews
and get very intoxicated. However, not to worry,
on this world, the bartender is used to visitors
who can't handle the native liquors... So,
the bar has their own taxi, on standby
for such occasions. So he dials the cab.
But before the cabdriver comes, the taxi
has to be gased up. The question is:

'What gas station does he use? '


Written & Copyrighted ©: 1/31/2014
by: MoonBee Canady



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(5)
'Barsoom/Mars' Whiskey Bar...'

A Thern and a Thark, walk into a bar...
They join John Carter, who was drinking Cutty Sark
and a Martini. Also there, is The Princess, who
sips on deja-blue water and a shot of Royal Crown.
The Thern, gives his order for a glass of Jameson & Gin

And the Thark, orders: Jim Bean and Jack Daniels
... and a Bourbon... and a Beer


Written & Copyrighted ©: 1/31/2014
by: MoonBee Canady


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(6)
'Star Trek's Hit The Deck'

As They Journey Into Darkness & Each Distant Star
Kirk & Spock Walks Into The Enterprise's Bar
And Tho' The Ship May Shake & Warp-Drive-Drop
Mr. Spock Keeps As Cool As A Glass of Ciroc
And Captain Kirk, Just Orders A Scotch On The Rocks
('Cause Scotty Takes Care of All The Enterprise's Stock)


Written & Copyrighted ©: 1/31/2014
by: MoonBee Canady


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(7)
'The Flying Car Bar...'

George Jetson, drove up to a bar at 1 0'clock...
Fired from, Spacely Sprockets, earlier, George
was feeling low. So George sat drinking his
woes away - thru 2 and 3 0'clock. George left
the bar and began driving home by 4 0'clock...
George was stopped however, when 5-0 clocked him.

Question: 'For how long was George detained
by the police?

(Answer: for A Space Age)

Written & Copyrighted ©: 1/31/2014
by: MoonBee Canady


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(8)
'Flash & The Radar-Bar...'

Flash Gordon, went into a sports bar
to watch a game and to 'Ming-gle'...
Much later, when he left, he was stopped
by an officer for 'flying blind on a rocket-cycle! '
Now, when Flash asked the officer if he would
let it go, just this once... the caribbean officer
(who was a fan of Flash's) , replied good naturedly,
'Mon-gol'

Written & Copyrighted ©: 1/31/2014
by: MoonBee Canady


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(9)
'Star Wars In A Star Trek Bar...'

A rocket and a missile, flew into a bar...

'oh wait... that was a Klingon, a Romulan,
a Vulcan, a Borg... and a Space Cowboy
(* yuk, yuk)


Written & Copyrighted ©: 1/31/2014
by: MoonBee Canady


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(10)
'Lost In Space/Wrong Bar Stool...'

Will Robinson and the Robot, go into a juice bar...
The barkeep, a wormy-squirmy, looking character,
looks at them, frowns, then says, 'We don't serve
his kind in here! '... The Robot, highly offended, starts
waving its arms akimbo and launches into a tirade
of 'warning', about a lawsuit against the bar.
But the barkeep, still squirming and astonished,
interrupts the Robot... telling him, 'I wasn't talking
about you... I was referring to him - Robin-son! '


Written & Copyrighted ©: 1/31/2014
by: MoonBee Canady


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Open Bar...

Liquor Is An Elixur of Celebration
Since Man's First Flask To Space-Age Libation
A Part of Our Lives In Every Civilization
GOD... Gave Us This Delicious, Joyful Creation

Even Noah Indulged In Tasteful Intoxication
Jesus, Turned Water Into Wine At A Wedding Occasion
Its Warmly Welcomed At Every Established Bar Association
For Wine, Is Good Medicine - In Moderation...

So, Let's Walk Into A Bar... and Order A Cosmo
or Whiskey, Champagne, Wine, Saki or Some Ouzo
or Vodka or Rum or Gin... or Just Have A Beer
and Socialize & Celebrate The Universe... Right Here


Written & Copyrighted ©: 1/31/2014
by: MoonBee Canady