Motherless Child Poem by Tigest Samuel (TG)

I am a motherless child
The discarded
I, many times entreated
And argued....
With my own God
Why?
Even a Hen builds a nest
A safest place
To lay her eggs
And faithfully sits on it
Until it hatches
Under her wings
Why?
My loving God,
Why am I subjected to rejection?
Am I not worthy of her affection?
Or am I just less than,
The mere egg of a common Hen?

My infamous mother
When she pulled the trigger
She aimed it right at my heart
The bullet of abandonment
A sharp pang through my vein
A stab of eternal pain
The bleeding of that carved hole
Still dribbles deep in my soul
Difficult to comprehend
I was just three month old
Probably, I cried myself to sleep
In my crib.....
Probably, I sucked my fingers
To sooth myself
From the pain of lack of love

Everybody has a “mother”
It is a universal factor
But mine, mine walked out
Left me with the missing element
No compass.....
Just broken dreams
If she was around
She would have made a difference
I remember once...
In that pivotal moment of my innocence
When I was playing on the field
I fell down on the ground
As my tears began to stream down on my cheeks
Then I heard the neighbor’s voice

“Dust yourself off....get up child”
“Hush it now....clean up your muck”
“Go on.....Move on”
“Broken ankle won’t kill someone”

I knew right then
As the echo of their words
Ringing loud in my ears
Telling me to blind all my senses
I knew right then
No “mother” of mine
Is near by
To pick me up....
With sympathy
Or those soothing words of
“Oh my baby”
I knew right then
There will not be anyone,
Not her...
To lift me up....
Throw me up in the air
And catch me as I descend


With no fear
In the warm voice of endearments
To embrace me in her arms

I am a motherless child
The discarded
I, many times entreated
And argued....
With my own God
Why?
Even a Hen builds a nest
A safest place
To lay her eggs
And faithfully sits on it
Until it hatches
Under her wings
Why?
My loving God,
Why am I subjected to rejection?
Am I not worthy of her affection?
Or am I just less than,
The mere egg of a common Hen?

How I wish all this questions
To be answered
What must be like?
To eat from her loving hand
To hear her say... I am her pride
In those pitch-black night
The sound of her “lullaby”
“Oh my baby don’t you cry”
To feel her soothing in my heart
The healing from her maternal heat

What must be like?
To sit on her lap
And just nap
Cuddle in her arms
Immerse in her warmth
To fear no evil
No nightmare
‘Cause she is there

What must be like?
To feel her scent
Her comforting voice
Her fingers through my hair
Her tender care through my vein
Her validation of my existence
Her protective hugs
Her love and her assurance

How I wished to know
What must be like?
As a child
To have a mom
Bleeds for me
Cries for me
Who would give everything
Just to be
To be with me

Even now as an adult
I can’t bear this hollow heart
A sense of loss
The need to mourn
Craving for the unknown

Shall I write a letter?
Addressing her?
Should I use her name?
Or call her... “mother”?
Then better I shall seal it
With my tears
And stamp it with so many why’s
Or may be I shall write to God
Her God...
The Almighty
Who let her free
Of her duty
Maybe I should as well beg him to hear my plea
To remove this agony
This veil of hurt
To teach me how to be
With out her
To heal this missing heart
Hidden anger
To forgive her
But not to be
Not to be her

I am a motherless child
The discarded
I, many times entreated
And argued....
With my own God
Why?
Even a Hen builds a nest
A safest place
To lay her eggs
And faithfully sits on it
Until it hatches
Under her wings
Why?
My loving God,
Why am I subjected to rejection?
Am I not worthy of her affection?
Or am I just less than,
The mere egg of a common Hen?

[To the reader: God said in the Bible book of Isaiah 49: 15, “Can a mother forget her suckling so that she should not pity the son of her belly? Even these women can forget, yet I myself shall not forget you”. Even though this scripture may have some other significance, but it can bring a great comfort for children/adults who are abandoned intentionally by their own mothers and it will help them to know that they are in the memory and embrace of God, who is the greatest source of love.]