New Year's Toast 2013 Poem by David McLansky

May you survive the coming year,
May you be free of doubts and fear
May few grey hairs snag in your comb
May no earthquake collapse your home;

May no hurricane or wintry blast
Nor flood waters rising fast
Inundate your dry sealed house
May you not lodge a pregnant mouse;

May no tumor nor no foul disease,
infect your nose and may make you sneeze
May you rise just like a phoenix
With a giant box of kleenix.

May no madman with a gun
Shoot at you just for fun;
May he take his own life first
And leave a note with final burst;

May no tornado spin around
And seal your bunker underground;
May Taylor Swift wear boobs of cotton.
May Justin Bieber be forgotten.

I lift this cup of fresh eggnog
And salute you naked on my blog
It’s a good thing that I don’t have Skype,
Like Christmas fruit I’m over-ripe