Nothing New Poem by Eman Awad

I have to get my self togther after this poem,
i have to start living my life as it should be..
I've to realise i'm standing for this on my own,
i have to realise that he left me...
Or that i left him or we left each other,
i don't know any thing for sure yet.
I'm over a wound to another,
wounds are the best that i get.
I miss him so much, is that clear,
did you think it's a poem of some thing else?
I feel no other thing but my fear,
that i've lived an illusion and i needed help.
My birthday is this saturday,
will he come saying what i desire?
Or this memory just faded away,
along with the smile that i admire?
Will he come running back to me?
will he know that no one would love him like i do?
Or am i lost in a sweet reverie?
and no one feels what i'm going through.
And his birthday is on sunday,
should i go and say words i don't know if he awaites?
My breath is fading away,
will words join two far and different faites?
I can't think but of the love,
and the age we'll reach nothing but apart.
I can't think but how tough,
my life would be and the break of my heart.
I'm lost for the beauty in my life,
when your smile was the most beautiful of all.
I am strong and i'll survive,
growing older far from you,
growing far from my soul...