Nothing Worse Poem by Carita Blodgett

How do I keep finding the strength to go on?
Another day of empty and then another dawn.
My child taken from me,
an never ending hell you cannot see.
There is hole in everything I do
nothing has meaning, nothing seems new

How do I keep managing to face the day?
Knowing I’ll never feel that tug of my hand to come play.
No parent should have to bare a pain like this
To learn such horror and loss really do exist.

I need her back so bad it’s agony
Not my baby girl! No this can’t be!
I am so angry I want to shout & scream
But I know this wouldn’t bring her back to me

I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel
I don’t know what part of me is real
I lie awake and can’t believe it’s true
Where do I go from here? What am I supposed to do?

When I sleep I can hold her, so real it seems
I wake up trying to hang on in my dream
This isn’t fair she was all I had!
To endure this is enough to go mad

I will tell you the truth and this won’t be mild
There is nothing worse then being a mother without her child