Of My Little Sister Poem by A. Jayaprakash Jayaprakash Panicker

Of my little sister

I get tremors down my spine
The moment I see her plight.
A girl of her composure needs
Not this, but much much more.

I shed tears down my throat
And cough up my anguish
The same way a tin can does.
How much do we all need
To lead a life of our likes?
How long do we all need
To understand that we die
Not live, every time we lie?
Growing alone is a torment
Growing in a crowd is so too.

If we cannot see the plight
Of our most close and beloved
How can we see our delights?
Distance is a beautiful haven
Where what is ours is closer.
Looking from far, we are abler
Than we unfortunately are.
Being closer to the familiar
And their filmy fantasies
Is a kind of safer recourse,
Which gives us all, the same
That we look all our life for.

Some scores of days and nights:
Insecure, flashing and filmy.
They offer us much more
Than we happen to garner.
What we come to hold at the end
Is not what we are ordained to.
Still we feel astonishingly sure
That we are what we actually are!
A world without me is the same
World, which is with me per se.
Our world is a place of no use
Unless we all turn our eyes
Back into us and to our bloods.
It is in the making of the latter
That the former finds its anchor.

Lest, it is a stormy ocean of pains:
Pity and hate, canker and caprice.
Where are we to find our peace?
When are we to find our winds?
How can we make our amends?
What’s it that makes our lives?

That which doesn’t make our lives
Is, sadly, what actually keeps our lives.

about my sister who got neglected thanks her being born at the end of the family line, the eleventh child, and she lost her father right after her birth. we the brothers have been miserable failures to see her through her life. it is our selfishness and our being too much obsessed with what is ours is the root cause of all this. i love her.