Painkillers Poem by Vidushi Khera

Painkillers

Rating: 3.8


My heart ached with sorrows that I had all my life,
It was like being cut to pieces by a knife.
But just as I was about to die, just before it was too late,
I got joys that were like painkillers, but side effects filled my heart with hate.
When I asked - “Why? ” Why is all the pain for me?
I was told - ‘It will make you strong from inside you see.’
I hoped it would be soon, but life shattered all the hopes I had.
I asked “Why? ” and all I got for a reply was - ‘Aw isn’t that bad! ’
I said I didn’t want to live this life anymore.
And I was told - ‘But that would hurt your loved ones for sure! ’
And so I’m back at where I was - crying my heart out again.
Hoping that painkillers of joy will somehow ease my pain.

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Declan McHenry 14 December 2005

Notwithstanding that it does have a strong message this didn't work for me. The rhyme is simplistic and there is an absence of rythym and timing in the that make it difficult to read. I'd be tempted to either go exclusively for short simple rhyme or else forget about the rhyme altogether and aim for an open and freeform prose work. That way the message would not be obscured. Just my personal opinion anyway.

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