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Ogden Nash

(August 19, 1902 – May 19, 1971 / New York / United States)

Peekabo, I Almost See You


Middle-aged life is merry, and I love to
lead it,
But there comes a day when your eyes
are all right but your arm isn't long
enough
to hold the telephone book where you can read it,
And your friends get jocular, so you go
to the oculist,
And of all your friends he is the joculist,
So over his facetiousness let us skim,
Only noting that he has been waiting for you ever since
you said Good evening to his grandfather clock under
the impression that it was him,
And you look at his chart and it says SHRDLU QWERTYOP,
and you say Well, why SHRDNTLU QWERTYOP? and he
says one set of glasses won't do.
You need two.
One for reading Erle Stanley Gardner's Perry Mason and
Keats's "Endymion" with,
And the other for walking around without saying Hello
to strange wymion with.
So you spend your time taking off your seeing glasses to put
on your reading glasses, and then remembering that your
reading glasses are upstairs or in the car,
And then you can't find your seeing glasses again because
without them on you can't see where they are.
Enough of such mishaps, they would try the patience of an
ox,
I prefer to forget both pairs of glasses and pass my declining
years saluting strange women and grandfather clocks.

Submitted: Monday, January 13, 2003

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  • Rookie Fizz Flare (11/10/2006 8:48:00 PM)

    This is one of the most hilarious poems I've read. I think it IS how most middle-aged/old folks feel - Frustrated at little things. He gave an instance here... you have myopia and hypermetropia at the same time and are forgetfull to add on to it. Funny but not to those who experience it! (Report) Reply

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