Relying On Yourself Only Gets You So Far Poem by mona martinez

How do you go from,
somebody who had to rely on yourself,
to trusting people around you,
and let them help you any way you can?
It confusing,
how do you ask for help from somebody,
when you can't explain at the moment,
what it is that you need?
Relying on yourself once again,
cause words mean nothing,
when you don't know how to put them,
in the correct order to get your point across,
feeling helpless once again,
feels just like being that kid again,
that could not say a word,
when all of the bad things were going on,
and now that I can speak,
I feel just as confused as before,
only there all of these fears in my mind,
that ppl don't seem to understand,
I may be an adult in this moment,
but my mind still feels like a kids,
afraid that people will pull away,
when I get difficult to put up with,
a person can only handle so much pain,
before it gets the best of them,
it during these times,
everything that matters seem like a fog,
they seem out of reach,
impossible to get back,
it the time I realize it good to have ppl,
who will tell you what you need to hear,
to bring you back into reality,
and help you push through the pain,
that it will start to get easier.