Rituals Poem by Estefano Molina

I don't know why I'm here
but I sure made it
She comes and greets me as I pull up
and we go through the regular ritual
'How ya been? ' and what not
she looks different
she was never the greatest
but she'll do
and so will I
I get a grand tour of her condo
seems she is doing well for herself

I still don't know what the hell I'm doing here
but after we get comfortable
we make our way to where we were bound to go
she puts a random movie on
tells me its good
but we both know we're not watching
it's just background noise
its that moment we both been anticipating
Our bodies finally touch
and thus another ritual begins

I enjoy this one better
until my mind wonders off
what the hell am' I doing here?
I can't seem to shake this feeling off
then I think
I'm just here to meet my needs
selfishness at it's finest
no pleasure
no attraction
but I'm here

The background noise returns
we're done
back against the head board
I don't want to touch her anymore
and I don't want to be touched
but she is there
touching
and still I'm thinking
now angry at myself
what the f*** are you doing here?
I get up in a rush
she knows I'm leaving
and I know she wants me to herself
I know she loves me
but I'm too hungry for flesh
and she very well knows this
I'm not that type of man
she walks me to the door
another ritual to say our farewells
these are always awkward
she hugs me tightly
and I know it's coming
but it would be rude not to
she plants one on my lips
it leaves a sour taste
she closes her door behind me
its late
I make my way down the long corridor
down the elevator
in my car
I'll be back again
I know
and its a long way home