Self Staker(For Michael But Not About Him) Poem by Dónall Dempsey

Seeing as no one else would
I started stalking

me.

I was beside myself
with joy

like
wow

everywhere I’d go
why...there I’d be!

Always kept one step ahead of
my Self

spying on me with evil intent

ogling myself as I’d come & go
I also...went.

Fancying my Self
like mad

finally it got so
bad

& I had to take out
a court order
on me

restraining my
Self

saying that I
couldn’t come
a hundred yards
within myself

& when that failed
I had to have my Self

arrested
& taken into

my own
custody.

But now
having observed

my Self closely

I realised I was
nothing special

(quite ordinary
actually)

& I went
totally off
my Self

couldn’t stand
me no more!

And that’s when it dawned

I’d have to find
somebody other

than my good
Self

to stalk &

“Well...hello...there! ”