Crystal Castro

(06-09-1983 / Tacoma Washington)

Shaun J. Leach- My everything, my life, my rock


Sitting alone, again on the couch
With this pen and paper in hand.
Tons of memories, my mind keeps racing
Because lately, there are some things I dont understand.
When we first got together,
I remember we were so deeply in love
The way you held me; kissed me
I could swear the feelingss were sent from above.
Sure we had our disagreements,
Nothing too big or extreme
Until the first time you broke my heart
It was something from you, I never imagined I would have to see
We moved on from that
We kept going steady and strong
And not but a couple of months later,
Your sister called to tell you about your mom
To see your reaction, the look on your face
I was completely speechless, never knowing the right words to say.
I did my best to stand by you
And I still watch you struggle with it day by day.
About 6 months later or more
Was the worst thing that could ever happen to me
I lost my home and all my things
You stood by me still
When I lost Angel and Travis - my family
Things weren't any better in our lives
From that moment on
You got into some trouble
You faced the consequences and lost your job
But I still remember the day
April 10,2009 - I called you on the phone
And like I've told you many times 'things well get better'
Sure enough, we had finally gotten a home
I was the only one working
I supported you and me and our new outlook on life
The thought actually crossed my mind
Of fulfilling your wish - taking your name and becoming your wife
Later on I was at fault - made a bad choice
The biggest of all mistakes
After I told you ' I will NEVER hurt you'
Everything came out
I literally watched you crumble, I watched as your heart would ache
We ended up being forced to spilt for a few months
I was alone, very lonely, so very much afraid
Thinking about the day you would return to me
How we would make things in our life change
You finally caught a break and found a job
I was so happy I wanted to cry
But not too long after you started working
Is when, to me, you heavily started to lie
I found out you wanted someone else
I never understood the reason why
My heart is the one you had to destroy
But you never realized you were also hurting, our innocent little boy
You do your own thing to stay happy
And i'm sorry if I get in the way of you having some time on your own
But if you only knew deep down lately how I feel
Maybe you would see how I feel so lonely, so unloved, so alone
You're making new friends
And for that I am happy
But honestly, I barely see you anymore
I feel as though you have forgotten me
I've been trying my hardest to make this work out
When I open up to tell you how you lately make me feel
You said some pretty harsh things to and about me
' The last 6 years with you, was a waste of time! ! ' With more hurtful things to shout
I started letting it go, because its you that I really want
I want us to start over and be happier together
Be able to go together out into the world
And show EVERYONE we CAN love each other again
But my heart has been deeply severed
You think its perfectly fine lately to keep secrets from me and have things to hide
But one thing you're forgetting
I ALWAYS find things out, I can read into the lies
I am fully aware of the fact
That we won't, as before be the same
But things have changed between us drastically
Like a flickering candle ready to lose its flame
You have currently robbed me of my pride
You have kicked my heart into the dirt
I don't think you have the slightest clue
As to how much it all made me hurt
The lies keep coming
More secrets to hide
And now absolutely NO ONE
Sees me, your girlfriend, the one you called your soul mate
Standing by your side
I can't figure out or begin to think of what I have done so wrong
That with this feeling, I sit alone, always
Remembering the words to our song
I really don't know how my life would be
If one day you truly walked out that door
Our definitely wouldn't hurt any less
For if you leave, I don't think I could go on anymore
Look back at EVERYTHING we have been through
Look at what we have over come and done
I sat here for months waiting for you
And together we brought into this world
Our FINAL child, our last born son
Its one thing to put ME down and tell me off
And put me through all this misery and pain
Im beyond shocked you could ever say such things to me
Because I thought we BOTH didn't want a failed family again
I wish I could still come to you
I wish WE could still TALK
Because no matter what, I will always love YOU
You have been my EVERYTHING,
You are now my LIFE
You are still my ROCK!

Submitted: Wednesday, December 26, 2012

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Poet's Notes about The Poem

Something I wrote when my man and I were in a bad point...on the brink of falling apart

Comments about this poem (Shaun J. Leach- My everything, my life, my rock by Crystal Castro )

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  • Veteran Poet - 2,932 Points Khairul Ahsan (9/4/2013 3:13:00 AM)

    Sigh! A very passionate poem telling the story of ups and downs. At the end of the day, not too sure if the marriage sustained the trials.
    But one thing you're forgetting
    I ALWAYS find things out, I can read into the lies.
    I fully agree, all wives do, all wives can!
    The poem is too long, but the curiosity to see through it kept me reading on and on!
    But things have changed between us drastically
    Like a flickering candle ready to lose its flame
    Beautiful! Nice poetic discourse. (Report) Reply

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