She Comes In Black Armor Poem by Dakota Ellerton

Thinking back now,
it was almost a dream.
Sleep deprived I stumbled in and layed beside him,
pulling the covers up.
'You're an idiot, you know that?...',
I said as I gave him a hug.
It was dramatic.
Boy takes pills,
girl rushes to boy,
girl sounds angry, but calm.
He stumbled over his words,
and had told me how much.
For a few hours we just layed there and talked.
Things felt unreal.
It wasn't long before we'd gotten up,
and smoked a bong.
I really should have said no.
Not only was I loopy from no sleep,
but now I was high.
We got in the car, and he drove me home.
I'd showered and changed.
Not realizing,
I was covered in hickies under my sweater.
With clouds of smoke surrounding my memory,
I'd never seen someones face dropp so quickly.
Was he...crying?
I was so high and confused,
I shrugged it off.
Giggling and rambling,
I kept going on.
'Why must it feel so wrong when I try and do right',
sang Kid Cudi.
Such a silence still echoes through my mind,
as I couldn't really say a word after that.
I could tilt my head back a think of things,
to rip my heart out.
Though the playing field is as even as it can be, yes?
I play on repeat,
every word spoken with the intent of pain.
Tears dripping off my chin,
It's a given love.
The medication absorbs into my body,
my head starts to spin,
my eyes start to water.
When I said you were breaking my heart,
I ment it.
Maybe you had intruded on a delicate moment,
but I could never tell you that.
You'd look the other way,
with a sickly face.
What kind of simple man do you wish to be?
The kind with love and understanding?
Grasp that into your palms.
Closing my eyes,
everything melts away.
I'll only think of a single shape,
a single image.
And surely know,
I'll never open my eyes again.