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(1991-02-06 / nepal, kirtipur)

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she didn't love

everyone has a past and so do i.
but its gone, the knot i did untie.
why don't u get, it did happen for a reason.
i was stuck there for a while but now I've moved on.
the reason is i was destined to meet you.
i cant rewind and change the past, i simply can't undo.
i was in love with someone then but no longer i do.
we had different thoughts, our destiny was different to.
why don't u understand people can love again?
its you i m in love with, u run through my vein.

i don't like turning back but why u try to unfold the past?
'will you be able to love me like you did her' -she asked.
will you care me like you did her?
will you move ur fingers through my hair?
can i trust ur love, will it be pure?
will it be like the first time, like before? '
and i answered-'yes, i will love u unconditionally for sure.'
then she said, 'no u cant, i have seen how u used to adore.'
the way u used to love her was to passionate.
even though u love me, her u can not forget.
it will pinch me remembering already once true love u did find.
i cant let u enter my heart when someone is running on ur mind.'

i tried convincing her, i will love her today n every tomorrow.
past is just an excuse, feelings for me in her heart never did grow.
i cant blame her, its me who shared too much too early.
and its raining here, when the sky is not even cloudy.
and yet i did fail in love, i failed to prove it.
my heart shouts with agony, screams in pain in every beat.
she says i got everything she was looking for.
but when it comes to loving me, not a single word she can utter.
chatting half past night, text in the early morning.
those blushing cheeks after seeing me, heart that never stopped praising.
and i thought i really was ur superman! ! !
and i thought ur heart i have won.
and i was wrong.
my feelings are torn.
and she says me to move on.
i wish i could say its already done..

Submitted: Friday, January 24, 2014
Edited: Saturday, January 25, 2014

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