Smiles Full Of Secrets Poem by Alecia Nak

I only open my mouth to say a word or two
I only eat small portions of food because
it can only fit a certain amount; certain secrets
and certain lies that lay deep down in that box
if people ever see me without a smile
secrets spill and I will be accused of drowning people
I only say very little because only sudden depression
the only thing I would love to do anytime of the day
is to throw away this cursed smile
that holds every thing I wished I never had
I'm not shy nor am I innocent
I just have a misunderstanding smile
if only if I could smash it into millions of pieces, but
hold on wouldn't I regret it as well?
like how
I just can't stop aching at what my kindness
did to those I love so much
what can I do?
smile because theres nothing else but to lock away the secrets
Thanks anyways