Richard Lee

Stuart Pidly

My tale of fortunes lost and found
From darkest woods where I recline
Don't do as I Stu Pidly did
I'll share with you the warning signs

When driving please stay on the road
If that's the way you get your kicks
Don't do as I Stu Pidly did
Attempt it at the age of six

For relaxation take a bath
Or TV watching may be apt
Combine as I Stu Pidly did
The two and you to will be ‘zapped'

While bun-gee jumping for your thrills
Excitement will be surely wrecked
That's me Stu Pidly in the ground
The length of rope I should have checked

While charming snakes please stay quite calm
If ventures thus you will partake
As I Stu Pidly lacking charm
Am speaking from inside the snake

If lions maybe take your fancy
Head in lions mouth of course
Don't follow me Stu Pidly folks
Please check you don't smell of mint sauce

While fishing for the great white shark
A brave and most courageous feat
Don't follow me Stu Pidly please
My boat was mostly made of meat

As sky-diving was once my love
It made my senses quite acute
The error I Stu Pidly made
The small action-man parachute

If swallowing swords is quite your thing
For love of some variety
Don't join as I Stu Pidly did
An amateur society

For those who have a taste for chance
Russian Roulette is full of fun
Don't fool as I Stu Pidly did
With a fully loaded gun

These signs I bring to you my friend
As Nostradamus did before
Like him Stu Pidly I am dead
My own advice strictly ignored

Submitted: Wednesday, July 09, 2014
Edited: Wednesday, July 09, 2014

Topic of this poem: humour

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